Knudsen's Hollywood

Mercury Rising

2009-03-10T22:57:00.000-07:00

Mercury Rising a 1998 movie staring Bruce Willis and Alec Baldwin. In 1998 the two stars were as they should always look like. Older but still in great shape.

The movie is an action thriller about a nine year-old autistic boy who solves a top secret NSA code and then has to be killed to ensure its validity.
The whole far fetched big brother enemy of the state type affair that you know could never happen is always a good watch. Yeah the US government agencies are that good, in their dreams.

Bruce Willis plays Art Jeffries an FBI agent trying to protect the boy (Simon) from the evil clutches of Baldwin who plays Colonel Kudrow the head NSA bad guy who will kill anyone including his own people because it fits in with his insane view of patriotism.

Willis soon has everyone looking for him including the FBI and no matter what he sticks with the boy because its the right thing to do and even though giving up would be so easy.

The film isn't deep and can be far fetched but its still a good watch getting wrapped up neatly in the end. You will have Die Hard flashbacks in the last 10 minutes though.

Pitting Exe's Against Each Other

2008-12-31T00:12:00.001-08:00

In the Daily Mail News paper it has Marley & Me, starring Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson, taking $14.6million (£10million) on its opening day and took an additional $37million (£25.3million) over the weekend.

Then it gloats about how it beat her ex-husband Pitt's new film The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button taking $11.4million (£7.8million) on the opening day, landing at the number three spot.

So fuck? Its at Christmas time and families want funny and fluffy animals rather than interesting. In America they bill any old crap as 'The number one movie' because there is nothing else out that week to rival it.

Don't get me started on the summer block busters. Just because a lot of people go and see a film it doesn't mean its good.

I haven't seen either film and hope to never see the first as it looks lame and predictable, probably a nice and sometimes funny film but nothing special.

The latter looks more of an interesting premise and Pitt is the better actor of the three. I'd risk renting out The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button and I doubt anyone will be buying little old men for their kids at Christmas.

Pull The Plug

2008-11-29T23:56:00.000-08:00

I sat doon and watched Wall-e then I got up. Yeah yeah Pixar you are so clever I get it. Set in the future Wall-e is a robot trash compactor that is cleaning up America while the people lounge in a space ship hotel. I assume the more sensible Europeans don't have this problem. You see an advert for the space ship with its swimming pools and tennis courts and all the people are fit looking people in red jumpsuits all having fun. I bet they just killed the poor people as that is the way America tends to be leaning now with the funding cut backs.
A robots named Eve is sent to America to look for plant life and Wall-e falls in love which is odd as he must be a closet ghey as all he seems to watch is Hello Dolly.

On the space ship everyone aboard are big fat fuckers its like America now. Floating around in their power chairs being slovenly. Not only that but the people are quite stupid.

I stopped watching the shite but I can see how kids will like it. Just in time for Christmas. Like most Pixar they hint at sexual relations between the main characters but you never see robot penetration.

A Wally in the UK is a moron.

Too Much Of Viggo's Arse

2008-11-28T23:32:00.000-08:00

I have just watched Eastern Promises starring Viggo Mortensen and Naomi Watts. I had high hopes for this film but it just didn't deliver. Watts did her usual squirrel toothed cute performance but seemed out of place but had a nice arse in those jeans. Mortensen was a typical slicked back smoking Slav whose character just wasn't fully fleshed out. I had heard about the naked fight scene in the sauna but seeing Viggo's bum and little todger violently killing bad/badder guys was just too much. He played a Russian mobster who was really on the payroll of Scotland yard but this was only briefly mentioned. Its a David Cronenberg film and its like he heard a little about the Russian mob and thought it was enough to make a movie about.

The film milled about but didn't go anywhere, nothing was finalised except he was now deep into the mob which we assume was his mission.

I then watched A History of Violence with Mortensen and Maria Bello which was also a Cronenberg film. Better than the first though I was still sickened to see Viggo's bum yet again.
Viggo played a Philly mob hit man who changed his name and became a family man in a small town. When his cafe is robbed he shows his skill for killing which tips off the mob as run by his brother. Ed Harris comes looking for him and eventually Viggo's family finds out the truth. More to this film than just posing about looking slavic.

Bello is a beauty as usual and William Hurt does well as the crazy mob brother in the final scenes.
Cronenberg doesn't seem to be very good with endings and a simple word or two at the end would have made it more satisfying but Cronenberg ends in silence.

Its like Cronenberg is making films for himself. Lay of the heavy handed drama and take more time with the story not the lighting.

It was enjoyable to see Viggo's teenage son beat up the bullies at school with some good moves. Watch History of Violence and give Eastern promises a miss unless you like Viggo's pasty white arse.

Leon

2008-03-17T00:14:00.000-07:00

The 1994 film 'Leon' or in the States 'The Professional' is one of my favourites. Jean Reno as Leon a hit man who we find has a vulnerable side when he meets 12 year-old Mathilda as played by Natalie Portman. He looks after the girl and forms a relationship which is filled with sexual tension that is never fulfilled due to her age and his need to be alone and not get involved with anyone. Gary Oldman plays an insane crooked cop, a scary unpredictable bloke.

It has good action and humour and Natalie Portman makes me feel like a dirty pedo as she poses and pouts all the way through.

Tropic Thunder

2008-03-07T02:03:00.000-08:00

Ben Stiller is a god, I love the guys films and this one looks like a cracker.

Jack Black , Ben Stiller and Robert Downey Jr in the film Tropic Thunder, an epic action comedy co-written and directed by Stiller. Robert Downey Jr. plays Kirk Lazarus, a very serious Oscar-winning actor cast in the most expensive Vietnam War film ever.

Problem is, Lazarus's character, Sgt. Osiris, was originally written as black. So Lazarus decides to dye his skin and play Osiris. I'm pretty sure this was done in Soul man but with Ben Stiller at the helm it has to be good. He directed 2001's Zoolander. and with Tropic Thunder he takes aim at actors for his jokes.

Downey plays one of a team of self-indulgent stars cast in the modern equivalent of Apocalypse Now. Stiller plays an action hero who has just adopted a baby from Asia but worries that ''all the good ones are gone.'' Black portrays a comedian known for performing multiple roles in a single film — his latest is called The Fatties: Fart 2.

But when the film's director (Steve Coogan) and writer (Nick Nolte) get fed up with their prima donna cast, they drop them into the jungle to fend for themselves.

The actors think they're doing some sort of full-immersion filmmaking, but the danger they're in is very real.

This was the film that Owen Wilson was dropped from because of his problems.

Pirates Of The Caribbean At Knob's End

2008-02-02T02:53:00.000-08:00

I watched Pirates of the Caribbean At World's End the other night. Now don't get me wrong I'd never pay to watch it especially after seeing the last two. It was lying about and I was bored so I settled doon to view it.

So much didn't happen in it that I can hardly remember it. I do remember thinking what a pussy Orlando Bloom is and what a ghey name he has and how Keira Knightley and her chavette voice annoyed the fuck out of me.

Johnny Depp has gotten boring now, the novelty has worn off, Keith Richards had a small part as his father which I've heard people rave about even though it was a badly cut and a badly acted performance, stick to getting out of yer skull and playing the banjo because Johnny Depp does a better you than you.

After a while of double crosses and cannons working in the rain I just decided this piece of shite was geared towards idiot teens in every way. I hope there isn't another one. Fuck Disney has a lot to answer for.

Will Turner was cursed to spend 10 years at sea and one day on land, he spent the day at the end shagging Elizabeth, I don't know why she didn't go with him aboard the Flying Dutchman, not in the script I suppose but you just know that he impregnated the slapper to have a 10 year-old in the next film ::::::yawn:::::

Just as predictable as if James Bond falls in love, you know the woman will die in the end and he says the title of the film somewhere along the line It'll be tough fitting in Quantum of a Solace or whatever the fuck the next one is called. I'm just going to watch my favourite game show, Quantum of a solace.

I saw the trailer for "I am legend" and knew right away that Will Smith's dog would die in the film, for fucks sake Hollywood the odd surprise might be nice now and again.

Children Of Men

2007-12-26T03:09:00.000-08:00

I watched the film Children of Men starring Clive Owen, Julianne Moore and Michael Caine. Its set in Britain 2027 and no children have been born for 18 years, they just stopped having successful pregnancies. The borders are closed and Immigrants are treated like scum who are rounded up and deported. Clive Owen's character "Theo" is asked by Moore his former lover to escort a pregnant woman to safety. Moore is part of an extremist group called "The Fishes." I'm not a big Owen fan, he plays wooden feelingless characters but this one fit him.
He and Moore's character lost their son during the flu outbreak of 2008 so his life went to shit, hes in a crappy office job narrowly getting blown up in a coffee shop by the fishes, Islamists or the government who knows? he has to walk past pitiful refugees in cages and not let it bother him, he has become insensitive on purpose.
Michael Caine plays an old hippy friend who smokes pot and invites people to pull his finger so he can fart, he is what keeps Theo sane, the only bright spot in his life.

When Moore, a wanted terrorist comes back into Theo's life he wants more, she does too but they skirt around it because of the painful past, they flirt and bicker and the love is still there but that's it.
Kee the pregnant girl, a hippy midwife, Theo, Moore and another male terrorist are in a mini van, the camera work in such a small space and the interaction of the characters is incredible, you have to watch the making of it to really appreciate it .

Moore gets killed and Theo walks off to the side crouches down by a tree and cries out of sight from the others, then someone calls him and all of a sudden hes calm and back to normal, that shows a great insight into the character. Owen shows he has great body language when he lets himself go, I can now relate to Theo as I have been there myself.

The director Alfonso Cuaron does really long takes following the actors. A lot to take into consideration and choreograph, you notice it in one scene when the camera gets splattered with blood and the amount of time it stays on the lens before Theo looks up a stairwell and its cut.

I love that style and the grey grainy colour they give the near future that is quite believable. The funny thing is that its no longer the world's oldest person that makes the news its the world's youngest person instead.

Based on a book by P.D. James its a good film to me because of how its made and the scary idea of a near future that could easily happen. The film does turn into a running through buildings getting shot at by everyone free for all which to me is a cop out that many movies use to tie things up and when the baby is born it goes a little like Jesus being born thing.

A breakthrough character was Syd a prison guard. A small powerful man with a thick Scottish accent who was quite nuts, he talked about himself in the third person and was scary in the sense that he was unpredictable.

A good film over all and I'm glad I bought it even before I saw it.

News Flash Hollywood Stars Are Human

2007-12-06T21:55:00.000-08:00

I blame the photographer for being crap than the model. If you see anything wrong with this then yer brainwashed by the media or nit picky and will never be happy with anything.

Jennifer Love Hewitt was annoyed when she was called "fat" after she was unflatteringly snapped on a beach in a bathing suit: "To all girls with butts, boobs, hips and a waist, put on a bikini," the 28 year old, advised, "put it on and stay strong." The gurl is a size "2" theres more fat on a chip.

JLH seems to me like a nice gurl and a nice person unlike many in Hollywood, big shock she isn't perfect.

I'll always think of her as the perky breasted young gurl running from a slasher in the "I know what you did last summer" films, she doesn't have much up top in the tit region but its always been very nicely presented in wonder bras.

The gurl is 28 and pear shaped, I hate to tell the media but celebs are only human too and look as bad as any of us at the wrong angle and in normal lighting. Get off her case, do you want all the weemen in Hollywood to look like this because you gave them a bad self image?

Give me a happy healthy gurl any day than a skinny dying fucker. When I take a gurl out to dinner I don't want her spending more time in the bathroom throwing up and snorting lines than she spends with me.

To any stars out there I say be happy with yerself and don't believe anything the gutter press has to say, just do yer best.

The New Kirk?

2007-11-24T22:15:00.000-08:00

I did say in my other post how a young good looking unknown bloke would play Captain Kirk in the new film, low and be-hold its going to be Chris Pine, who? well you may know him from Just My Luck and The Princess Diaries 2, what you haven't seen them? I don't really give a crap about who plays Spock or Bones to me they are just window dressing, it looks as if Simon Pegg will be playing Scotty, that will be interesting.

Brendan Gleeson Instant Review

2007-11-14T23:39:00.000-08:00

Brendan Gleeson is one of those actors thats in everything and has a vital part in the film though you may not even know his name. Born in Dublin he starting acting aged 34, before that he was a maths teacher for secondary school kids.

He had some small film roles but only really got noticed as Hamish in Braveheart (1995) to be honest I didn't know it was him at the time. The man is a great character actor good with accents and never phones in a role, if he does you can't tell.

He was my favourite character in the crap film "Gangs of new York" in 2002 in which he dies and in 2003 played Frank in 28 days later and also dies and the directors know the audience feels the loss if he is playing a good guy as he does it so well.

A ton of movies which I haven't seen but I have seen Troy in 2004 and when Gleeson plays a tough bastard he does it well, yes he gets killed.

One of the few actors I know who can disappear into his roles, for a big broad 6 foot 2 inch guy to appear menacing or non-threatening that's no mean feat.

I like Gleason he has an easy talent to him and can be a scene stealer no matter who he is with by just having on-screen presence .

We Only Want Big Ears

2007-10-31T00:13:00.000-07:00

"I am Star Trek damn it."

Interesting news about the new Star trek film. Leonard Nimoy is said to have a part in it, I wonder if it will show him as an old Vulcan vucker yammering on about the old days and then it goes to flashback , fuck I hate those geezers. William Shatner was disappointed not to be offered a role in it but I hate to remind the old cunt, Kirk kind of died. I knew that would come back to bite him in the arse, maybe he could get a part of Doctor Who if he took a pay cut.
I have my old red shirt dusted off and ready to wear in case I'm needed, how many fucking times did I die on that 5 year mission? I got so sick of seeing the tunnel of light.

Matt Damon a Knudsen Review

2007-10-21T01:15:00.000-07:00

Matthew Paige Damon born Oct 8th 1970 in Massachusetts and grew up next door to Ben Affleck. An Actor, screenwriter and producer. He won the Oscar for best original screenplay for Good will hunting.
In 1988 he had a role in Geronimo an American legend which as ok, and in 1996 he lost 40lbs for Courage under fire in which he played junkie soldier.Then in good will hunting as a thugish math genius.
In 1997 he did the Rainmaker which I enjoyed as he played an intelligent, nice young man, his stable type of role. Then Chasing Amy which I don't remember and Rounders which was a load of old bollocks.
1998 he played Private Ryan in Saving Private Ryan, a film I own and can watch loads of times, the end brings a lump to my throat as it is about those who have made sacrifices during WWII.

Hes 37 but looks 13, god bless him.

In 1999 there was The talented Mr Ripley which I didn't like, Jude Law is a cunt. I loved Dogma and the fact he played Loki, not really an angel but a Norse God.
2001 Oceans Eleven in which he played the young nice guy again, he does that role so well.
2002 The Bourne Identity, it doesn't get much better than this, Bond can fuck off, I own this movie and love it.
2003 Stuck on you in which he played a co-joined twin which Greg kinnear , it was funny but could have been better, really I need to write gags for these films.

The Bourne Supremacy in 2004, great!

Then he co-starred in Oceans Twelve, less said about that the better.
2005 Syirana, he was very good in it, he had anger at losing his kid in an accident also he had a coldness and took the human option, not the nice option but the human one, they paid him off .

What a normal down to, earth guy, seen here which his child and wife Luciana Bozán Barroso and a pigeon .

So much still for me to see, hes a name that you know will yeld quality, a nice bloke on and off the screen, I'd love to be mates with him .

Jessica Biel A Knudsen Review

2007-10-19T01:51:00.000-07:00

Jessica Claire Biel born 1982 she is an American actress and former fashion model best known for her role in the long-running family-drama series 7th Heaven, which I avoided for being a Yank moralistic piece of shite.
I've seen her with the old bow and arrow in the third Blade film, like a chick Orlando Bloom from Lord of the rings.

She is still young and her best work is a head of her, what I notice her for now is her great arse, the gurl is hot and wasting it on Justin Timberlake.

Brad Pitt A Knudsen Review

2007-10-14T00:42:00.000-07:00

William Bradley "Brad" Pitt born 18 December 1963 in Oklahoma and grew up in Missouri. He went to Kickapoo high school where he did sports, debating, student government, and acting. Then he attended the Missouri school of journalism.
His early roles included soaps and sitcoms like Head of the class and Growing pains and also did Dallas but not like Debbie.
His break through role was in Thelma and Louise as a drifter who soon became every woman's fantasy.
He did Cool World in 1992 which I get confused with the roger rabbit film. Also he did A river runs through it which I own on DVD but that's because do a double pack on sale and you have to get the crap one to get the good one, also Kalifornia which he played a crazy red neck type, he plays crazy good.
In 1993 he did a cameo in True Romance as Floyd, I love that film and someday I shall own it.
1994 with Interview with a vampire, bad casting for him and Cruise and crap makeup, I always quote the line "why do you whine so much Louis" and I say it as Cruise does as if I have a mouthful of fake teeth.
1994 Legend of the Fall, I love this film and own it, I also own Se7en which was done the same year , he plays detective David Mills, a brash fella who has stress tells like rubbing his hair, I would have shot yer man at the end too.
1995 Twelve monkeys which I must own, again playing crazy but nutso crazy this time. In 96 he did The Devil's own in which he put on an Irish accent and played an IRA man, unless the IRA are portrayed as evil child killers then I'm not too impressed.
1998 Meet Joe Black, I get caught up in this film and sort of fall for death myself, some may call his acting wooden in this film but then again most people miss half the acting.

Why do I not look like this?

1999 Fight Club, if yer a male and you don't like this film then you need punched, Tyler Durden is not a pop culture icon, so many layers in this movie its brilliant and Pitt can act. Yes I have this on DVD.
2000 Snatch, I usually don't go to the cinema but I did this time, Pitt plays a dirty pikey brawler, a great character and a great accent, funny as fuck, a Guy Richie film that's cool on so many levels.
The Mexican, I love this film, the location the story the direction, I'm not big on Julia Roberts but there is so much in this film that you watch it and think yeah shes ok in it. I have this on DVD.
2001 Spy game, good movie but a bit slow in places. Ocean's Eleven, he was Rusty Ryan a cool bloke who was second in command in the gang, Pitt used food props a lot like Robert Redford and you could tell that he and Clooney are great friends. I own this on DVD.
2003 Troy, great fight scenes but too much posing, Pitt does the kind of booming pretentious voice actors do for these roles if they aren't British, a bit silly still, I own this on DVD.

2004 Ocean's Twelve, I bought this and regretted it, but Brad looked good even in white jeans.

2005 Mr and Mrs Smith, I bought this and liked it until it ended is a free for all wrap it up shooting scene, Brad and Angelina were both great. I don't care about the private stuff that's their business, marriages happen and fall apart .

That's as far as I have got, I hate reading a book that turns into shit and I hate buying crap films. Brad is a pretty solid actor and I will take a chance on most of his films. I think hes brilliant, his roles are never continuously the same. He also uses his name and money to help others which is great because anyone with a few million to share should feel it their obligation to do so. Brad is one of my favourites and I wish him well.

Even with the press hounding him non-stop there is an air about him thats private and you'll never reach but hes a good man.

George Clooney A Knudsen Review

2007-10-13T00:09:00.000-07:00

Lost in translation

George Clooney was born in Lexington, Kentucky. His mother, Nina , was a former pageant queen, while his father, Nick Clooney, was a journalist, anchorman, game show and American Movie Classics host, as well as a politician from the state of Kentucky. He has a sister Ada and was the nephew of the late Rosmary Clooney.

He didn't do too well at school but excelled at baseball. He later attended two colleges but never graduated.
He started acting in TV shows such as The facts of life, Roseanne, baby talk and of course ER which went to make him a star.
From those shows ER was the only one I've ever watched, (the wife liked it) Clooney's character Dr Doug Ross was a nice competent caring doctor but with a wild side .
Clooney also did voices for South Park, the most memorable was Stan Marsh's gay homosexual dog Sparky in which Clooney only made barking noises, it goes to show the genius and balls that South Park creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker have to give a star like Clooney a role like that, and it shows what a humble , humourous actor Clooney has to be to do it, the man is not a Diva.

Always time for fans, even the ones that can't get their camera working.

Dusk Till Dawn, directed by Robert Rodriguez in 1996 Clooney played Seth Gecko, what a great movie experience that film was, vampires, Salma Hayek with her sexy dance and Clooney being cool as ever with tribal tattoos though from what tribe we aren't sure, buy this film on DVD.
I want to forget One Fine Day with Michelle Pfeiffer as chick flicks bum me out, but The Peacemaker playing military loose cannon Thomas Devoe along side Nicole Kidman this was an action chick flick which is ok in my book.
In 97 he became Batman, I have no idea why as that franchise has long seen its sell by date, I do remember from the film that they gave him nipples in his costume which was just very wrong.
1998, Out of sight, a good film co-staring Jennifer Lopez, she was good in this and very hot, its a sexy film all round, I have it on VHS.
Clooney has done so much, I can only really talk about what I've seen so I do miss a lot out.
In 1999 in Three Kings he played Major Archie Gates, another brilliant film I love the scene when hes shagging the reporter and shes chanting, "trained warrior, trained warrior" there is just so much to that movie, great characters, action, tension, layers and the way Director David O Russell put it together its perfect, I have it on DVD.
Perfect storm and O brother where art thou in 2000 didn't do much for me, being a fisherman I like to see fishers come out on top and as this is also a true story its quite sad to me, the brother film just didn't do anything for me, though it had its moments like shooting cows with a tommy gun.

2001 Ocean's Eleven as Danny Ocean I just loved the cast and the script, these guys had fun, even Don Cheadle's terrible cockney accent didn't spoil it, I own this DVD.

I still haven't seen Confessions of a Dangerous Mind but to my shame I did see Solaris, boring or what? I don't want to see Intolerable Cruelty as I can't stand Catherine Zeta Jones and spy kids I can really do without.

2004 Ocean's Twelve as Danny Ocean again and he was also the Executive Producer, this film so pissed me off, they brought in Zeta, and sure they had fun during the making and it shows but the plot negates the first film and is just shite and so they didn't win first time round after all. George looked kinda old during this, maybe he wasn't well due to his bad back as hes looked better since. I bought this DVD on the strength of Eleven, I don't have excessive money to buy bad films so I feel cheated and let doon by this one.

The last Clooney film I saw was Syriana which he also Produced, he got a best supporting actor Oscar and gave a great speech, he deserved an Oscar but for other work hes done but its all politics and if theres a line formed then you have to wait yer turn. Syriana was ok, beautiful set pieces but dragged on unnecessarily, Clooney was good though.

I always like to hear Clooney speak as he is a witty fucker, he was speaking at a National Board of Review event and said: "Charlton Heston announced again today that he is suffering from Alzheimer's."

Some didn't take this joke well though I laughed.

"It was just a joke," Clooney responded. "That was someone else trying to make a bigger story."

Fucking funny lad, don't let them tell you otherwise.

Charlton Heston commented, "It just goes to show that sometimes class does skip a generation," referring to George Clooney's late aunt, Rosemary Clooney.

"ouch!"

Then he said, "who are you people? get out before I get my gun if I could remember where I put it."

Clooney is a liberal but he doesn't seem like a knee-jerk idiot type that thinks only in black and white, he has spent time in Chad and Sudan highlighting the Darfur conflict with his father, making a film on it, its good that he uses his name and money to do good like this . He seems like a good man and it shows in his acting and acts of generosity a movie star throw back from the past but with a modern edge.

He needs no stinkeen introduction

Hes a likeable womanizer with a heart of gold, the Cary Grant of his day, long may he grace our screens.

Yes George Is Perfect

2007-10-03T17:41:00.000-07:00

The love sick kid had better have his act sorted if he wants my picture.

Outside the new York hotel where George Clooney was staying was a fan from berlin who had been waiting 5 days to see him. Finally when he got his chance for a picture George had to point out to him that it wasn't open, either the lens cap was still on or the shutter wasn't open. The lad panicked to get the camera to work but all was saved when a paparazzo took a picture of them.

Most other stars would hold up their hand and speed off but George was gracious enough to spare a minute of his life for his stalker fans, a minute that lad will never forget ever. George Clooney is better than most movie stars, he reminds me of the stars of the 40's and 50's but with a modern edge to him, the others could learn a bit from Mr Clooney.

Instant Star Profile

2007-10-03T07:27:00.000-07:00

Elisha Ann Cuthbert is a former child star from Canada who went on to play Kim Bauer in the series 24, she also had a hit and got noticed in the 2004 film 'The gurl next door' in which she played an ex porn star, a highly shagable young lady but not porn star material, real tits and bad acne, don't do close ups gurl.

There is just something about her, maybe its the chin.

A decent actress that hasn't got into her stride yet I don't think. Personally I just like to look at her, she has my full attention in every scene and is one of those gurls that looks better without a lot of make up (unless she has zits) thankyou Ms Cuthbert for giving an old man the horn.

A Role He Was Born For

2007-10-01T23:11:00.000-07:00

From the people who saw Braveheart and Gladiator cums "Fuck its the Vikings."

When I heard that leonardo DiCaprio was expected to play Brian Boru in an up and coming film I was shocked. Is leo a good enough actor that he could play an Irish wolfhound ? the mascot of the Irish guards and the defunct Irish Rangers ?

Then I read on and found it was Brian Boru who was some high king of Ireland, what did they name a king after a dog? those zany Irish, always drunk you know. Boru defended Ireland from the Vikings and the movie is slated as the Irish Braveheart, calling it that just means its going to be shite, but the paddys will lap it up and Gerry Adams will cum in his trunks.

Leonardo here can act, but hes a lightweight. He isn't the big pulling power of Clooney or even Damon, Leo is just above Affleck status but gets hyped and he believes it, 32 years old and still has the aura of a boy about him.

lets hope Leo works on his terrible Irish accent by then, why could they not have gotten a famous Irish actor like............................... or .............................

This Idea Is Going To Choke

2007-10-01T07:51:00.000-07:00

I'm a Kirk fan, he was the captain of the Enterprise, from the series to the films he was the man. A man of honour, duty and still compassion, he fell in love every other week and had numerous punch outs with the bad guys. He never gave up he always looked for another option to win the day because he knew the heavy price of losing, the destruction of his ship and the deaths of his crew.

Since the original series (TOS) theres been the next generation, (TNG) Deep space nine, Voyager and Enterprise. Pale in comparison to TOS only TNG came anywhere close, its like they took half ideas and tried to build a franchise with them, if they took bits of each they might have a half decent show.

Now they want to recast TOS to make a Star trek film. Who will play Kirk? Matt Damon has been mentioned but they will get some unknown 22 year old who lacks presence but appeals to the gurlys, I long since went off Star Trek as it went the way all things do in a shallow capitalist country they ruined it all, to distract the viewers who have always been intelligent geek types they throw in some hottie in a tight out fit, hot but insulting.

A prediction of the film

A young boring Kirk, some hunky sidekicks, a hot gurl, a younger brother to get into trouble and an animated space monkey thing for comic relief, maybe a talking computer with an attitude.

Come speak to me before you fuck Star trek up anymore.

Shaken Not Shagged

2007-09-30T13:42:00.000-07:00

Lois Maxwell, the Canadian-born actress who played Miss Funnyfanny in the James Bond films, has died of cancer in Western Australia aged 80, they saved the baby.

She appeared in 14 films from 1962's "Dr. No" to 1985's "A View to a Kill."

She was the Sectary to the secret service boss 'M' and would always flirt with Bond when he came into the office, lets hope off screen her character got her hole.